James Blunt and Daniel Powter to merge

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ames Blunt is to merge with Daniel Powter. News of the merger ends weeks of speculation after both artists in recent times have struggled to match their early career success. “I think, after much negotiation, it is the best thing for both of our careers”, said Mr Blunt in a post-agreement statement, before adding “the two of us together will undoubtedly make us stronger and more capable of regaining the success that we once took for granted”. His new musical partner, who is Canadian, described the merger as something that will “open up some brand new doors for the two of us that weren’t there previously, or at least ones which had been slowly closing”.

It was thought that with the return of– and indeed success– rivals Take That, coupled with the growing popularity of Irish hit-makers The Script, a huge slice of both singers’ MOR and highly polished market had been drastically eaten into. “No-one in 2005 or ’06 could ever have foreseen that, not only would Take That reform and be so successful but also that a brand new act would appear and take a huge chunk out of Blunt and Powter’s fanbase”, said an insider who, not only wished to be unidentified, but was relatively unmoved when we informed him that we weren’t especially interested in who he happened to be in the first place.¬†When asked when the first fruits of the merger would be made available to the general public, the same insider had this to say: “oh sh!t, back in a minute!”.

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